when u use ur boobs to get someone to notice u
*opens blank tab* yes mom im doing my homework leave me alone dont you trust me at all
I was at the Oscars, waiting to hear if my name was called, and I kept thinking, Cakewalk, cakewalk, cakewalk. I thought, Why is ‘cakewalk’ stuck in my head? And then, as I started to walk up the stairs and the fabric from my dress tucked under my feet, I realized my stylist had told me, ‘Kick, walk, kick, walk.’ You are supposed to kick the dress out while you walk, and I totally forgot because I was thinking about cake! And that’s why I fell.
I’m okay, really. I’ve got magic beans.
if everybody got a free miniature animal at birth that protected you, like a tiny elephant or dragon, the world would be a better place.
write a book
You could call it The Golden Compass
This is the best thing.
this is very important.
take notes, world.
i’ve been hearing about lots of shitty things in the world and i was on the tube on my own in london today, which is the most depressing thing because london is where the values of humanity go to die
this made me feel a whole lot better <3
you could kill a man in any of these dresses, and pretty sure no jury would convict you. those are killing-men dresses, that’s what i’m saying